How Can I Perform Liposuction On Myself?

I need to get fat off of my abs/stomach but it is so hard and the results take too long to come. I think liposuction is a good option, but I dont have the money. I've been thinking about self-liposuction, but its very complicated. I need something that is sharp enough to cut through the skin without too much pressure, like an X-acto knife, or if you can think of anything else to cut with. Where can I buy that cutting object? I also need some way to numb the section I will be cutting becuse that would really hurt. How and where can I get a topical anesthetic to numb the skin and the parts under it? Plus I need to know if I will bleed to death or if blood will gush out like mad, and also if the cut will heal on its own or if I should go to the emergency room for stiches. I am serious here. I am really going to go through with this once i get the right info. Thank you for your help.